Let Go

"You make me brave, you make me brave no fear can hinder now the love that made a way." 

-Amanda Cook

You know that uneasy feeling you get in the depths of your gut sometimes? Like everything around you is about to fall apart but you're not really sure why you feel that way. There's no physical harm coming your way, no sure threat of sudden death and yet... there it is. That fear, that unsettled anxiety on the inside. You feel off. 

For me this always happened when I felt like I was getting hit from every angle. Just one thing right after another and that's the way it seems things always happen. Everything slaps you in the face at once and you're left feeling defenseless. The good news is that you're not without a weapon. You're not out in the open with no shield. The enemy loves to make us feel like there is no way we can win. Like life is dishing out a beating and all you can do is lay down and take it; hoping, praying it ends soon. That's not who you have on your team though. 

God is not a god of fear or anxiety. He is not a god who leaves us on our own in the middle of battle. He is right beside you. You were not made to live defeated or afraid. He is the peace in the middle of the storm. He knows what is happening He hasn't abandoned you nor is He ever caught off guard by our circumstances. He knows and He is constantly fighting for us, whispering words of comfort to our hearts. 

One of the hardest lessons I had to learn was how to let go. I always felt like I had to carry it all and keep things together. It was like I was juggling so many different things and if I lost focus for a second everything would come crashing down and fall apart. I knew that letting go would cause me to breakdown and I didn't want that. I didn't want to look weak and broken. What I learned though is that it came down to trust. I didn't trust that God would carry me through it, that He would be able to hold it all. In reality, I wasn't really in control at all. My emotions were, my fears were, my constant effort to measure up was. When I finally gave myself permission to take a breath and let go it made room for God to come in and take control. I'm not going to lie my fears of breaking down came to life. I broke down hard and thats ok. It's ok to let everything go and lose control. It sounds scary and putting the weight on Him is terrifying. It's ok to admit that you can't do it anymore it's in those moments that He gets to show you how capable He is working on our behalf. 

If you are in a place where you feel like everything is crashing down around you, like you don't know how you're going to make it through just one more day, or like you can't even come up for air without another wave knocking you under. I want you to know that you don't have to hold it all. Let Him have it. Loosen your grip on the illusion of control. Give Him permission to cover your heart with the peace only He can bring. You don't have to know what that looks like or how to do it He takes care of that part, your job is to be willing. Then you have to let it go, release it into His hands. The amount of trust this takes it enormous and it is a process. There will be days when you find yourself trying to hold everything together on your own, in those moments remind your heart that those things don't belong to you anymore. God wants so much for us and He wants to give us more than we could ever imagine in our wildest dreams but for Him to do that we have to be willing to give Him the control. He will never be satisfied with a portion of you, He wants everything good bad and ugly. He can take it He isn't intimidated by anything you could ever throw at Him. You're ok, you can do this let Him show you how He created you to live. 

Let your heart rest, take a breath and come close to Him.